Spring of Water
Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” John 4:13-14
About a decade ago I was in a particularly dry season in my life. Ministry was going fine, but personally I was feeling empty. I shared with some colleagues that it felt like I was sitting in a shallow puddle trying to splash out spiritual water to those I was ministering to at the time. My ministry was not flowing from a deep well of spiritual water and I could feel it acutely in my soul.
Considering the verses above, why would that be? As a follower of Christ, filled with the Spirit and faithfully serving the Lord in a ministry role, why was I not experiencing this vast spring of water that Jesus referenced in John 4? Where was the disconnect?
The problem was not the work of Christ or the Holy Spirit in my life, it was inattentiveness to the flow of life-giving water itself. I had said “yes” to too many ministry opportunities and had not allowed myself to be restored and refreshed by the life-giving water before trying to pass it on to others. I was neglecting to Sabbath; had allowed my own personal times of devotion to become nothing more than stale, shallow rituals; and was ignoring spiritual and mental health issues that should have been warning signs that there was more wrong under the surface.
I would like to say that it was a wakeup call, but I continued to operate in that way for several more years. I would slow down enough to get my footing and then push the rest of the feelings down while pretending everything was well with my soul. But I was still mostly living in the spiritual puddle. Thankfully the Lord eventually brought me to a breaking point that forced me to address some of those deeper issues and opened my eyes to things I had never realized about myself.
God helped me connect with a great counselor, changed some of my wrong thinking patterns, led me toward some better Sabbath practices, helped me prioritize exercise again, and deepened my walk with him through a more vibrant devotional life.
As I think back on those days and consider the verses above, it causes me to picture the beautiful fountains we see in gardens and parks and other areas. Those fountains are typically connected to an abundant water supply that provides plenty of water for the fountain to work. But it relies upon a pump, submerged under the surface, that draws water from the basin and lets it flow the way it is made to flow. As I picture my life during those days, it was like my pump had become clogged and was letting through only a trickle of water, so that it seemed like the reservoir of water was not enough.
The verses above remind us that the living water we have access to through Christ is more than enough. It is meant to both fill us and flow through us to others. But just like with real fountains, we too need maintenance. Sometimes things get clogged with the things of this world or other baggage that can get in the way of the inflow of that spiritual water.
One of the biggest “a-ha” moments in my life was the recognition that this is most likely to occur in my life when things are going well. The more I feel like ministry is being “successful” the more I tend to take on more than I should, ignore the warning signs within me, and pretend everything is okay. It is not just when things are tough that I need to be aware of how I am really feeling. I need to intentionally check on the “clogging of the pump,” if you will, even when things are going well.
My natural tendency is to ignore my own needs and trust that God will obviously take care of me as I just keep pouring myself out for him. But he is not just interested in working through me. He also desires to work within me. I am not just a vessel for him to use, I am a temple for him to fill.
I should have paid more attention to what I was feeling as my life-giving fountain seemed to be turning into a spiritual puddle. It should not have taken me so long to see that God wanted my attention and that there were things within me that needed to change. I should have been regularly attending to “the pump” to make sure nothing was in the way of what I needed to receive from Christ
So my challenge for all of us today is to take time to consider how the fountain is working within us. Are there things that are clogging up the works, interrupting the flow, or causing the fountain to not function properly? If so, don’t ignore it. Don’t wait until things dry up. Our Father truly cares about us and invites us to care about ourselves.
If you are feeling like any of this is resonating with you today, please feel free to reach out to me, or to any of us at the district office. We pray for all of you often and are here for you.
Rob Mapstone
Director of Recruitment and Placement